Well, what a year 2020 has been so far!  There are just three months left to go, and it’s during these three months that many engaged and in-love couples, start planning their wedding which begs the question “A celebrant, family member or friend, who will lead your wedding ceremony”?

There may be many reasons you want a family member or friend to lead your ceremony.  They are close to you, know you very well, and no doubt, were a major part in many of the fun times you had getting to this point.  Or, it may just be that you are looking to cut costs, in the current climate, I totally understand, I get it, I really do!  

Your Ceremony?

So, what’s the main part of your big day? Having your hair done?  Wearing a lovely dress or suit?  The big party, or is it the ceremony?  All the preparation and planning has been leading up to your ceremony, the core part of your wedding day.  That’s what everyone has come to see, you and your loved-one, making your vows. You declaring your love in front of all your friends and family.  Can you guarantee that your family member or friend will be able to pull this off for you, and deliver to you and your guests, the ceremony of your dreams? That’s one big ask, and a whole lot of pressure for someone who doesn’t do it on a regular basis.

Confident to deliver on the day?

Confidence is all it takes and I am sure you have a family member or at least one close friend who is a public speaker full of confidence. Someone who is able to compose, write and deliver your ceremony and ritual on the day, in the way you want it to be. Someone who above all, can orchestrate your whole ceremony so that it flows seamlessly. If that’s the case, then I say grab them with both hands and start planning. There is nothing nicer than to involve friends and family in your ceremony.


Be honest, will they really want to do it, or are they just being nice not wanting to disappoint you?  Wouldn’t they really prefer to be part of the crowd watching and enjoying your day with you?  Anyone can lead a wedding ceremony, as long as they have the right qualifications, and I don’t just mean on paper.

The Master of your Ceremony

A professional celebrant spends a lot of time, money and effort on training to become a celebrant.  Their aim is to be the best at what they do.  They spend a lot of time getting to know you and will write your ceremony as a collaboration with you. Crafting your ceremony around your love story filled with passion, love and laughter. From mastering the art of public speaking, being able to speak in front of large groups, the love of telling stories, and holding the guests’ attention, they will be the master of your ceremony.

No Show!  Now what?

Your big day arrives, and early in the morning you get the call to say your family member or friend is ill and cannot make it – I felt sick just writing that! You have spent a lot of money on the venue, catering, photographer, not to mention that knock-out dress to name but a few.  Now you have no one to lead your ceremony, the central part, the core of your Wedding Day.  What do you do, who do you call upon to take over?

With a professional celebrant, you will have signed a contract which lays out exactly what will happen in the unlikely event your celebrant was unable to attend.  Professional celebrants belong to professional organisations such as The Fellowship of Professional Celebrants.  They work closely with others whom they trust to cover for them. Those they can call upon in the very unlikely event they are unable to attend.  If your celebrant was to call you, they will already have the solution in place, be able to tell you who is able to attend and save your day.  If you are using a family member or friend, always ensure you have a Plan B just in case.  

Your Wedding Day

These are just some of the things to think about when choosing who will lead your ceremony.  You want it to be perfect, you want to enjoy it and most of all, you want your family, close friends and guests to enjoy it.  You will want it to be stress free and you will want it to be seamless.  Your family and friends want the best for you and so does your celebrant. Your celebrant will get to know you and write your ceremony with you, be there for you and guide you on the day. There is no pressure, they are professional, confident speakers and are there just for you. So, who will you ask to lead your ceremony, a professional celebrant, a family member or friend?

Whatever you decide, I wish you a long and happy life, health, wealth and happiness and of course, the very best wedding day ever.

Love and Hugs – Wendy

If you would like to find a celebrant in your area, The Fellowship of Professional Celebrants and The Celebrant Directory are two very excellent places to start. If you would like to know more about how a celebrant can help you with your ceremony contact me here.