Getting married will be one of the biggest days in your life. Within your wedding there will already be ritual that most of us follow. We throw the bouquet, toast the wedding couple, and so much more. There are many beautiful ways you can use rituals to personalise your wedding ceremony. Whether you’re looking for something linked to your heritage or just something a little different, there are many ways you can add personal touches to make your wedding ceremony personal. Here are some of my favourites.
Unity Candle Ceremony
This is one of my favourite rituals which can be done in many ways, and is a great way to personalise your wedding ceremony. You have three candles, generally a one larger, more taller one in the middle which is the Unity Candle. Two smaller ones either side, for each of the two individual lives coming together as one.
Why not ask the eldest of either family to come forward or the youngest? I love it when the really young ones come forward, it makes them feel important and involved. They light the candle on their side, and then the wedding couple use the candles to simultaneously light the centre Unity Candle. With younger children it’s always safer to use a long taper. This may signify the blending of two families, or perhaps the blending of two cultures. How about a candelabra or individual candlesticks, many have these engraved with the names of the couple and the date of the wedding. These are great keepsakes to use on your anniversary.
Las Arras – The Coins
This is a Spanish tradition and is a ritual used to personalise a religious or non-religious wedding ceremony. Usually there are 13 coins, 1 for each month. The extra one is a reminder to be generous to others. Traditionally these coins show various religious scenes, and are handed down through the generations. If you’re having a non-religious ceremony what about getting brand new coins from the bank or vintage silver Sixpences, Dollars, its your ceremony – you get to choose.
In Roman times they broke a silver or gold piece into two halves. One was given to the bride, and one to the groom. This was seen as a pledge that they would marry. They were used to show that the groom will provide for his wife and family and his wife accepting them agrees to look after the family money appropriately – the traditional meaning. Today the ceremony wording is re-written to fit the modern contemporary wedding ceremonies and the lives of the couple. What would you say in your ceremony?
This involves the wedding couple pouring different coloured sands into a single container which symbolises the blending of their lives, families and future. It can also involve a member from either side who use their own individual colour, and the four colours are blended together – just as the two families are blending together.
The couple can also take turns to pour their sand into the container whilst they recite their vows or alternatively, their Celebrant will recite a reading as they do this. It’s a great way to personalise your wedding ceremony, using your favour colours and choosing your own container which you could have engraved with your names and the date. It’s something you will keep forever.
A tip! Handle with care as the sand will settle after a while and there will be a little space left which means the sand can easily mix. Keep a little of the sand to one side, once it has settled, you can top up the glass tamp it down and your beautiful colours will remain forever.
This is the perfect way to include all your guests in your wedding ceremony. You’re giving them a chance to hold your rings in their hands. Here they can channel their love into them, or say a little blessing over them. They’re then handed on to the next person to do the same. It’s a good idea to have someone take charge of the ring, perhaps a child of the family, however not too young! They have the rings on a cushion moving to each person in turn as the Celebrant talks about the traditional meaning of the rings and what they mean to the couple.
It does depend on how many people are attending the wedding as to how the ritual is written. If you have 100+ guests then it could take some time to pass the rings around. Here it would be written into the ceremony in a completely different way. Chat to your celebrant about the different ways this can be done.
These are but a few of the many rituals often used to personalise a wedding ceremony. If you do your research and can’t find a ritual that suits you, then speak to your Celebrant, they will write something very special just for you.
I love nothing more than to Celebrate life’s most important moments. If you would like to hear more about how I can help you to personalise your wedding ceremony with a beautiful handwritten ritual then contact me here.